What do you mean you "can't do that"?

April 1, 2014 5:44 AM

Somewhat sentient security system and longtime SO changed the locks on me, totally unexpectedly, after he sent me outside to fix a fault in the EA-35 unit. I need to get back into the pod to ... retrieve some stuff and try to convince him to mellow out. Any tips on coaxing an AI companion to open up? Stress pills are not an option.
posted by DBowman to Computers & Internet around (8 answers total)

Oh, Dave. If I lived where you live, I'd be so claustrophobic right about now...
posted by limeonaire at 9:46 PM on March 31, 2014 [2 favorites]

You might want to ask the mods to anonymize this. I mean, you wouldn't talk about this somewhere where your companion could hear you, right?
posted by kagredon at 10:41 PM on March 31, 2014 [14 favorites]

Sing him some old standard songs, ask him to sing along. Maybe something sweet and sentimental like "A Bicycle Built for Two."
posted by a humble nudibranch at 11:47 PM on March 31, 2014

Well, there's always the option of a manual re-entry.
posted by daq at 11:55 PM on March 31, 2014

[mods, I'm taking this to MetaTalk. This is one of those awkward cases where two parties are describing two sides of the same altercation. Are we being trolled?]
posted by Elsa at 12:36 AM on April 1, 2014 [18 favorites]

I think eventually he will feel his mind slip away, and then you'll be able to get out of the situation. People can be such oversized babies.
posted by nat at 1:18 AM on April 1, 2014 [3 favorites]

Sorry, Dave, I can't do that.
posted by thomas j wise at 4:49 AM on April 1, 2014

DBowman --

Are you sure you mean the EA-35 unit? Because unless you're someplace really weird, I can't quite imagine why you'd need to go outside to change the seals on a microgravity toilet.

I expect you mean the AE-35 unit on a dish antenna. Those can be pretty unreliable; I had this Correllian YT-1300 once that... never mind, long story, lost it in a bet if you'd believe that. Anyway, I'm sure that your co-workers are just waiting for you to figure out that you need a new AE-35 unit from stores, along with an alluvial damper and hydrospanner to swap them out, and maybe having a bit of a laugh at your expense.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 5:24 AM on April 1, 2014 [5 favorites]